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Stuck in work another Bank Holiday
I mean it, next Bank Holiday weekend I intend to go to a dance festival held in a field and get completely off my face.
But till then I have alot of time to pass.
So I'm learning about Stephen 'mukkafooker' Hawking'sessesseses A Brief Brief History of Time.
Also I may take up Girl Watching, and practise becoming a dirty old man. Who knows what will come of mannequins, I cannot rely on them until my old age.
There is nothing better to do on a nice Bank Holiday weekend then go out a theme park . Or maybe not. I'll stay here for now.
And finally for all those in 'Da Hood. Get your horoscope here.
Anyways homeboys and homegirls, catch you on the rebound, whatever that means. I heard it on MTV the other day.
"Watch my show or I'll shoot my dog" - Jerry Springer, Yesterday.
So yesterday, Manchester's Granada TV studios was where we headed to. A bit too early for my liking. Ayways, we were there to see The Jerry Show, or Springer Show, or whateve the UK call Jerry Springer's show.
There was alot of hopes for the recording. What episodes would we be watching? Would incest or pig wanking be involved in any of the stories? We prayed to the Springer God's the stories contained all that and a bag of trannies.
So we got to Granada, excitied, phones switched off so no chance of mobile photos sorry. Waited a while to get to sit in the audience but it was worth it, just to be on 'The Show.'
So episode one. Two Familes Fighting Over the Same Father. Was alright. Probably the best of the three epsiodes. One of the families had definitely been practising their swearing and insults in the Green Room. Everything worked out okay, thanks to a DNA test.
My favourite line from this show ex wife to father in question "Last time I knocked at yours a little boy answered, said you weren't in."
Fathers new, scrawny short haired wife "Last time you knocked I answered the door."
N.B. If the NHS gave out free DNA tests, Jerry, Trisa et al would be out of a job, in my opinion.
Episode two was dire. My Husband Will Not Have Sex With Me. Although it had been worded differently as this show is going out at 9am. After 11 years of marriage some guy stopped making love to his wife. He was not seeing anyone else, neither was she. The romance had just died. No one had any questions to ask of this episode, maybe apart from "Why us Jerry? Why make us watch this damn awful dull episode."
But Episode three. Involved a toothless grinning old woman upset that her on/off boyfriend, Ozzy doesn't treat her well. Things started off good. But now, he is in bed all the time as he isn't working, due to the fact he is on the sick as he only has one arm (which he has just totally fucked up by telling everyone he works aswell down the local, cleaning - there goes the gyro) Also the fact that he stops bathing and all he does is get's up and goes the shop.
Ozzy's defence "I don't go strainght the shop when I wake up,. ha. I get dressed first."
Excellent defence.
All in all, it was a great day out.
Snow White in Gang Bang Shocker
Well I give the PYT from last Friday a call the other day. I had text her earlier in the week and said Ill give her a call about weekend plans. Anyways, I spent Thursday fitting in everything that I had to do all week in to that one day, overtime, voting, visiting parents, going the pub so by time I remembered to call PYT it was already about 930. Now I havent done the whole 'I'll call you,' thing alot, so I wasn't sure if 930 was a late time to call or not. This took up most of the discussion in the pub, what time would be considered as rudely late to call someone. We reckoned 930 was fine but 130am stumbling home from pub drunk would not be 'fine,' not even a little 'fine.'
Anyways, so I call and get no answer. I let it ring a few times an still no anwser so I send a text. Maybe she was busy. But I get no reply from the text.
This was not the first time I'd met a PYT in town exchanged numbers and never got a reply to the "call back."
I was starting to hate women at this point, for handing out numbers and then never answering. Why do women do this?
Anyways, yesterday, I throw caution to the wind, hey maybe there is lots of if's an but's as to why she couldn't answer phone/reply to text. So I try again and this time get through.
And I never lost my cool once........
Voxpoppin
Well 'The Drinks' did not quite go to plan.
After arranging to meet PYT at tennish I spent the about an hour having a few in La'Gos chatting with some nice students waiting for Milo gig to start across the road.
Incidently PYT was heading there after having a few drinks with moi and a good friend was heading there too with her mates. Something was saying to me "maybe this is the place to be tonight." Unfortunately being in work at 9am this morning a refrained from any heavy night of clubbing.
So after spending an hour chatting with the students in La'Go I decided to head to another bar and wait for PYT to call.
After walking around for 5 minutes trying to find a good suitable bar to drink and wait I happened to walk past "Heaven and Hell." Not the domains where the divine and the condemned walk but a pub, but you probably guessed that. So there is loud live rock music coming from inside H&H so I decide to head on in and pay my £4 entrance fee.
Inside I was quite shocked at how much I liked it. Full of students all in the heavy metal get up and moshing. Don't think I've ever seen a mosh pit before. I was under the impression they were no longer allowed. Maybe this was an 'underground' heavy metal pub?
Also I'd like to add here that rock chics ( I think that's what they are refered to) are gorgeous. Definitely need to figure out how to pull a 'rock chic.'
Well PYT didn't turn up but I still had a fantastic night and it seems after calling PYT a little later, she was running fashionably late, she use to do a little moshing a while back, so will be heading back here soon to try out moshing. Hey everything has to tried once.
I'd like what this lady has been up to. Thinking up female terminology for spanking the monkey. Any one have anyhitng to add?
Also, what did you have for lunch?
"You're so good looking."
Remember the whole London thingy I did a few weeks ago, testing out stuff for work. Well the boss has just sent an email to say thank you and will be giving me a 200 Great British Pound Sterling bonus.
Should make for a good weekend I say.
Get Off!
Not signed a petition in a while. Feeling like you need to do something, to make a point. Well sign this online petition to have the internet banned.
Please note, the resulting banning on the internet may put me out of a job.....so think about it first.
If I close my eyes hard enough, even I can be 'The Hoff'
So, what a fun weekend
Friday, I was itching to go out so whilst in the pub I repeated to my fellow drinkies that if we were staying in the pub I was off home, but if we were moving on then I'd stay and go to the next bar.
We decided to move on, so I kept asking when, when, when....I was kind of looking forward to going out.
After about half an hour we were still sat in the pub when along sits a pretty lady. So I gets to a chattin' and having a bit of a laugh, when one of my fellow drinkies, who happens to have a slight crush on me, stands up and demands we are going on to the next bar.
I try persuading said drinkie to "hang on a bit" as I was in mid conversation. Maybe she'd like to go get some drinks. This didnt go down to well and everyone else stood up to head to the car.
I felt slightly under pressure as I had been annoying these poor drinkies for the last half hour about going out and to now say no would look bad on me. So I didn't have enough time to get this young girls number and had to leave for the bar, where I did not have any fun at all mainly due to a posessive ex boyfriend of one of my friends.
The lesson of this story......NEVER EVER give up a girl for friends.
Saturday night was almost as more fun. Went to a new night in the near by Mersey View, called Planet Bounce, if you happen to be near the Frodsham area on the second saturday of each month I highly recomend heading in the direction of Planet Bouce. Whilst there we were entertained my some Nu-Hardcore [sic] music with a live MC, who was very good. And also some hip hop/breakbeats/scratch djs....infact there were 3 DJ's sharing 6 turntables, and it was alot of fun.
Sunday, well it was the first Sunday I had had off in a long time.... so I spent some quality time in the local.